The Quest for the Holy Dildo #21

The big day had finally arrived in Whiterun. Though the Jarl had made clear to everyone his intent to keep the wedding low-key, it was all Muz-Ra could do to keep the well-wishers at bay. She had stayed with her friends the previous two nights in the room at the Bannered Mare, where they had treated her to a bachelorette party that was as bawdy as she was. Fortunately it had been a private party and the things that went on there were well kept secrets by all her friends and the employees as well as the male “entertainers” that had been hired. But that was night before last. Last night the tavern had reopened to the public and she had retired at a reasonable hour with her closest friends, Ubergard and Kitty, who were with her now as she got ready for her wedding to the Jarl.
“For a low-key wedding, you know you’re going to make a hell of an entrance!” Kitty said as she adjusted her transparent dress for the millionth time. “I know. But this is what should have happened all those months ago. Besides, the citizens sort of expect it from me now. They get to see their future queen in-the-buff one last time. I can’t deny them that!” “Who do you think you’re fooling?” Ubergard asked, looking down at herself. “You get off strolling around in public naked as the day you were hatched! Did it ever occur to you that some people have this thing called modesty?”
“Oh, please Uber,” Kitty interjected. “For the last time… shut it. Either wear it or don’t go. You volunteered for this, remember? Where’s that Warrior’s Spirit I hear you and K’rris talking about all the time?” Ubergard looked surprisingly pitiable. “But… I’m totally exposed in this! I might as well be as naked as Red.” “Hey! At least your puppies are held down and won’t bounce around and hit you in the snout!” Kitty suddenly looked up. “Wait! I have an idea. Just a second…”
She went out to the balcony and came back in with Ubergard’s massive weapon, Virgindruung. “Here. Wear this!” The giant Argonian smiled and closed her eyes at it’s comforting weight. “Better?” Kitty asked.
“Much better. Is it okay if I wear this at least Red?” “Sure! Not going to stop people from looking at your boobs though,” Muz-Ra smiled. Ubergard looked at Muz-Ra with eyes sparkling, “No, but it will sure as hell stop anyone from staring at them for too long.”
“Hey!” Muz-Ra warned. “No killing the spectators!” Kitty sat back on the bed and was joined by the other two. “So Red, how are you feeling? Nervous?” “About parading naked through the town again? Not a chance.” “No, about marrying the Jarl?” “Oh… that. Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. I don’t know why I should be. I’ve been married before you know.”
“I’ve heard you say that. You don’t talk about it much though.” “Naa. It didn’t work out. It was my fault though. We still keep in touch sometimes. He’s working up around Solitude now somewhere. But he needed someone more stable than me. You may not believe it, but I was pretty wild in my youth.” “Who would have believed it?” Ubergard snorted.
A familiar voice called from below. “We’re all ready Red!” Muz-Ra looked to Kitty desperately for a second. “Don’t think about the wedding for now, Red. Just think about strutting your naked body in front of all those strangers.” The Argonian closed her eyes for a moment, then re-opened them with a large, toothy grin. “That is better! I bet some of the men will start jerking it the minute they see me!” “Sure they will! Women will be rubbing themselves against any nearby pole.”
Muz-Ra stood, puffed out her already ample chest, and headed out of the room with only the traditional Amulet of Mara for clothing. “Mustn’t keep my public waiting!” she called and confidently strode down the stairs to where the rest of her bridesmaids were waiting. Kitty noticed Bhusaran kept her traditional white boots on. “Glad you could make it Bhusaran! Can I assume H will be at Dragonsreach?” “He wouldn’t miss it for the world, Red. I hope you don’t mind the boots. They’re my security blanket.” “No problem! Well… Ladies?” she called with the confidence of a wartime General. “Let ‘em have it!”
“Cheetah? What’s wrong with Udaran? She looks a little… wobbly,” Kitty asked. Cheetah looked at her lover affectionately. “It took a little lubrication to get her into the dress. Alcoholic lubrication that is… Maybe a little too much.” “Nobody can see me!” Udaran half-whispered to Kitty, the smell of drink heavy around her. “…all looking at Red. You can’t see me can you?” “Not at all,Udie,” Kitty assured her. “You’re practically invisible.”

The Quest for the Holy Dildo #13

Meanwhile, in another room, Devilah was talking to Borri after having just finished a snack. “Quite a collection of Tails you have stashed under there! You like both Argonians and Khajiits then I presume?” “Oh, yes. I’m afraid it’s a fetish of mine. It’s part of what drove me to being a Greybeard in the first place. My particular taste wasn’t very well thought of where I’m from. Honestly you’re the first Khajiit… well…” “It’s okay. If you met a true Khajiit, you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between us easily. But I do thank you for not touching me physically. I’m… trying to do better myself. Sampson is doing his best to let me be me, but I know it hurts him somewhere inside. It’s nice to be able to help you out with just… well. Modelling shall we call it?” “Devilah, I speak nothing but the truth when I tell you that was the most incredible 10 minutes of my life!” The Succubus smiled back, licking her lips. “Let’s just say it was my pleasure and leave it at that.”
“Now that I can talk to you without being constantly distracted, how can I help you?” Borri said while dressing. “Well, I want to talk to you about self control actually. I can’t live without male ejaculate Borri. But, like we just did, I think I could learn to control my need to touch other men. Just between the two of us, it was all I could do to keep from stuffing you down my throat or up my ass when you were hard.” “But you didn’t, did you?” “No… I knew you didn’t need it to get off. Mostly I just tried not to look at it and concentrate on posing for you.” “Well, even among us ‘normal’ people, it’s not an easy thing to do. But up here we reduce the temptations too. That helps a lot.” “I don’t see how I can do that,” Devilah sighed, sitting beside the Greybeard. “I can barely look at a man without wanting him inside me some way or another.”
“Oh, I understand. Even with my fetish, I can’t help but be tempted just by a pair of boobs, even if they’re all covered up. I find myself imagining what they look like behind the cloth, what they feel like… what they taste like. Up here, that’s not an issue though.” “That’s it exactly! But as long as I can remember, I never even thought of not acting on that desire.” “And males, being what we are, never try to stop you I’m sure. Looking like you do, I doubt your advances get rejected often.” “Well, even if they tried to, I have this ability to… make it even harder to resist. And I’d use it without a thought. I’ve never been rejected, Borri. Never. Except by Sampson, but he was a special case.” “What you need is some way to get what you need without ever having to look at a penis.” “Or testicles. Those are just as bad for me. Hell even a male ass makes me want to…”
“Okay, okay. I get it. But what we did here… you managed not to touch me, even though you could have. Besides thoughts of Sampson, was there anything else than helped you resist? Odd, it feels so strange to think you had to resist me. I assume I wasn’t in some way… repellent to you?” “Oh no Borri! If it weren’t for Sampson, I’d have loved to have you in me! We Succubi… It’s pretty tough for us to acheive orgasm, but we can. I’m sure I would have with you. Let me think… Maybe… Yeah, probably because I knew I’d be getting it soon. I knew you couldn’t last long and that I’d soon have your ejaculate to drink.” “So, your desire is rooted in your need to drink our… stuff?” “Well, drink or otherwise absorb. I take it in externally too for that matter. What can I say? We’re kinda weird.” “No, no… I understand. I read about your kind quite a bit. Well, Succubi in general anyway. My books never mentioned one in Khajiit form. So, you can definitly resist the physical tempatation so long as you have a supply of male semen. But, you get that from Sampson surely.” “I do, but I need more. I don’t know why, but I need it from more than just one man. That’s the heart of my problem. Quantity isn’t so important. But variety is.”
“Wait! I have an idea!” Borri said, standing up suddenly. “What is it? I think I could excercise the self control I need, if only I could get it some other way.” “Now look, this might sound disgusting. But… what if we Greybeards kept our ‘stuff’ and sent it to you?” Devilah considered this a minute. “Borri, it’s not disgusting to me. I know it probably would be for you, but you must realize that to me it’s like the finest wine. It’s what I crave. My deepest fantasy revolves around soaking in a tub full of it while men continue rotating through and keeping the tub full while I wallow in it. But how could that work?” “Well, it’s cold up here you know. We could keep it stored frozen. Then, maybe every week or so, we could send it to you. Do you think that would do? Then you would get your needs filled but would never need to look at any penis but Sampson’s.”
“I… yes… I think that might work! Just one catch…” “What’s that?” “I… don’t think the magic works unless you’re getting off to me. And I couldn’t be here. I’ve never had the experience of drinking it from anyone who didn’t produce it for me, but I have this feeling that it’s kind of necessary for the men to be directing their lust at me. Still, it’s worth a try! And I know how to find out.” “How?” “While we’re up visiting the peak tomorrow, ask one of the others to masturbate something other than me. Not even a thought of me.” Suddenly both looked at his stack of Tails.
“A better idea!” she said, realizing the solution to her last problem was right in front of her. "I need to get a magazine made of me!“ Borri was right with her. "Better get a few copies. And we men… we’re awfully fickle. Last month’s erotic pussy-shot just doesn’t do it for us this month. You’ll need to make more occasionally.” “I even know someone who used to work there. Okay! I’ll get the publisher to do a special edition just for you guys. And I’ll show everything. Maybe even get Sampson in on the action and show him fucking the hell out of me. That’ll get you guys off!” “Um… Devilah… that publisher doesn’t even do full nudes. He’s probably not going to be too keen on doing a full pornographic magazine.” Devilah laughed. “H? Leave him to me. He’s male. I’ll have no problem with him. He’ll probably want to be the photographer. ” She began to pace the floor, thinking. “You think the other Greybeards would do it? I’m not sure if they’re as into the Khajiit form as you are, but if I could get regular donations from all of you, I’d be set!”
“You may not believe it, but we don’t exactly discuss such topics among ourselves. I’ve no idea who else likes Khajiits around here. Until today, I had no idea anyone else even masturbated. I thought I was the only one!” “Well, I’m going to go for it anyway. I owe you for this! Wait… how will I pay you for the donations?” “Pay us? Devilah, you’re asking us to jack off to your picture and you want to pay us?” “Good point. Isn’t nature wonderful? Thank you so much Borri!” Devilah said, giving the Greybeard a fierce hug. “Now I’ve got to go tell Sampson. Oh! I’d better finish getting my clothes back on.”
But as they started down the hall to where Sampson and Faniel were waiting, they found the others coming her way already. “Sampson! Borri and I have the most wonderful idea!” “Oh? Arngeir, Faniel and I came up with an idea too, though I don’t know if you’ll like it or not…”
The three travelers were laughing together, which undoubtedly disturbed the Greybeards after their days of sedentary life and silences. “What?” asked Faniel. “My knees are together!” “Oh, nevermind Faniel. I’m too happy to care! Borri even found containers for it. He’s going to keep them separated too. Oh, isn’t it wonderful Sampson?” Sampson was truly happy. “It’s absolutely disgusting, Devilah. But also wonderful in a very perverse way. What do you think Faniel?” “If it works and keeps you two together, I’m all for it. But you know, even if H is up for producing a magazine for you Devilah, it’s going to be some time before it can get published, get delivered up here, and get the results sent back to you – and we don’t even know where you’ll be.” “I don’t care,” Devilah laughed. “I’ll have my own delivery service!” “Devilah’s Special Milk! Now with 10% more Borri!” Sampson sputtered.
“Hey, don’t make fun of him. Besides, he tastes great!” “EWWWWW!” “You started it!” “Well, I may think it’s disgusting, but I’ll get over that. If I can have you all to myself someday soon!” Suddenly Devilah’s ears twitched. “I just got another idea. Sampson, I don’t know if you’re going to like it, but it means I can be yours exclusively even sooner.” “Try me.” “I can put on a show for them. Hand them some containers and have them watch the show. I’ll have a supply before we even come down the mountain.”
“You’re talking about a guy that had his Succubus lover take two guards last night. You think I’d mind you putting on a show for them? Hell, I’ll watch!” “Um… no. You won’t.” “Hmmm?” “You’ll be in the show.” “You… want me to make love to you with a bunch of old Greybeards watching?” Devilah looked at Sampson. “Yes Sampson. Yes I do. Believe me, they will not even see you. Every time you pump that dick of yours into me, they’ll be imagining it’s theirs. When I lick your balls, theirs will be tightening in sympathy. Sampson, there’s only so much I can do by myself. And I need them to give me all they’ve got. One shot isn’t going to do it. But when they see you fucking my brains out, that image will stay in their heads for weeks! Sampson… I need you to do this for me. Please.”
Sampson relented. “When are you thinking of putting on this show?” “Shows,” Devilah said, emphasizing the plural and knowing full well he was going to do it now. “I want to do one tonight and another when we come back from the peak. I can get at least another couple out of them all that way.” “You know, you’re turning these old men into your personal dairy farm, right?” Devilah looked innocently at Sampson. “No one’s forcing them to! But I bet I get a sellout crowd.” “This is gonna be tough, Dev. I don’t even know if I can get it up with a bunch of old men whacking off behind me!” “I’ll help. I still have some power over such things,” she said, unfurling her hidden wings as a reminder. “I’ll make you forget they’re even there.”

The Quest for the Holy Dildo #7

Klimmek and his friends watched the two lovers retreat to the privacy of their room. “That cat’s ass is awesome, but I’d hit that angel’s pussy so hard she couldn’t walk for a week!”, said one of Klimmek’s friends. The blow that came an instant later laid the man out cold on the floor as Klimmek looked fiercely at his other friend. “I’ll not hear such talk of my Lady Faniel!” he warned his remaining companion. The Bosmer held his hands up, “I wouldn’t dream of it!”
Faniel looked over at the two and smiled, nodding to Klimmek thankfully. Devilah’s voice rang out loud and gravelly with lust through the tavern causing more than a little bawdy laughter, “Dammit, screw these boots. For the love of all that is sacred, Sampson, leave the boots on and fuck me now!!!”
“Lynly?” Faniel asked the bard, “I wonder if you could play something for me?” Faniel asked. “I’ll try my best, Faniel. What would you like?” “Just… play along to this tune…” Faniel answered as she hummed a melody that was strange but hauntingly familiar to the patrons. A tune none could ever recall again. But, as the two lovers shed their clothes and their bodies mingled in the privacy of their room nearby, the Angel began to sing…
Lynly’s hands seemed to continue of their own accord as the angel’s voice began. None present had ever heard such a voice, and even the jaded bartender stepped from behind his post and sat to listen. The sounds of Sampson and Devilah’s passionate lovemaking seemed not to interrupt Faniel’s song but to add a rhythmic counterpoint as their bed began to bang out its own drumbeat against the wall and their moans of ecstasy blended with Faniel’s voice as if in harmonic accompaniment.
The song reached it’s emotional peak just as the lovers reached their own, and it seemed as if Faniel was vocalizing their own feelings as they fell back to earth, both sated and spent.
A long while later, Devilah noticed she heard no sounds coming from the tavern and asked Sampson if perhaps they should return. But he was asleep so she put her own clothes back on and returned. Outside, everyone was sleeping except Faniel. “What happened? What did you do?” “Oh, it’s nothing. They’re just sleeping. My singing tends to do that. They’ll wake up soon. How was your orgasm?”
“It was… incredible,” Devilah admitted, sitting on the floor beside the fire. “I thought I heard singing, but I wasn’t sure if it was in my head or not. You’ve got your own sort of magic, don’t you?” The Angel smiled. “I have nothing. All I have was given me. Sampson really loves you Devilah. That offer to the guards was quite a sacrifice for him. They’ll be here soon.”
“I know. He’s more than I deserve, Faniel. If I were a normal Khajiit, I’d reject them. But… I just can’t.” “I understand more than anyone, Devilah. I can’t divulge much of what happened before I came here, but I was your Guardian Angel for a little bit. You might say I read up on you. But don’t feel too bad. A sacrifice is worth nothing without some little pain. He knows you will do what you will do.”

The Quest for the Holy Dildo #6

The tavern was sparsely populated, but all heads did a double-take when Faniel entered. The Angel laughed loudly. “Well, hello to all of you too! Yes, I have wings.”

“And nice tits too!” said one inebriated patron.

“Oh yes! And check out this pussy!” Faniel laughed back.

“Looks like she’s smuggling a hamster.” said another.

“Looks like a tribble is giving her oral!” said the first.

“Oh!”, Faniel laughed alongside them. “You mean my pubic hair? Would you like it better shaved?”

“Yeah! Butter-smooth pussy is the best! Like a baby’s bottom.”

Sampson looked at Devilah, “What’s a tribble?“ to which she only shrugged.

"I’ll go get us a room,” Devilah said to Sampson. “You handle this!”

Sampson decided he’d better put a stop to anything before someone got the wrong ideas. “Guys, she’s new around here. And she’s off limits. Unless you want to follow the Orc I just beheaded. Just enjoy the show.”

Faniel frowned. "Pffft. You’re no fun Sampson. Stop worrying about me. Now I’m going to go talk to this man who clearly has good taste in the female form!“

"Watch yourself Faniel. They’re drunk.”

“In Vino Veritas,” quoted the Angel, to which Sampson just scratched his head.

Despite Sampson’s warning, Faniel walked up to the man and asked if he’d like to dance. The grin that spread across his face showed pure joy and he lept out of his seat, spilling his mug.

“And you, I presume, play music?” Faniel asked a lady sitting nearby with a lute on her lap. “Would you mind doing so for me and this gentleman?”

“I would be honored. I am Lynly Star-Sung. And you are?”

“Please call me Faniel. And now, good sir, could you show my friend how to treat a lady? Dance with me, if you would!”

Sampson and Devilah went to the bar and ordered some drinks, though Sampson noticed that Devilah did little more than touch the mug to her lips as they watched the pair in fascination.

The man, named Klimmek, stared into Faniel’s eyes as if in a trance, while she laughed and danced with him like she was dancing with the most graceful man on earth. It seemed her wings bore not the slightest hindrance for them, and even though he was apparently just some local farmer, somehow he was able to match her in grace as long as he kept looking into her eyes. Even the bard seemed to rise to the occasion and her voice was no longer that of a lowly bard in a backwater village, but transformed into something more.

Sampson looked at Devilah whose eyes were shining as they turned back to him. "Care to dance?“ he found himself asking.

"I… think I would!” she whispered, and the two joined the Angel and the farmer.

As the last note died away, not a word was spoken as the two pairs of dancers separated. Faniel broke the spell. “Thank you Klimmek.You dance wonderfully!”

The stunned farmer looked down at his shoddy clothes and back to the Angel with tears in his eyes, but could only stammer, “Thank you, m’lady… er… Lady Faniel. I was just kidding about the… hair.”

Faniel kissed him as he sat back down. “I doubt that very much, but thank you for the lie.”

The three travelers retired to a table while the bard started up another tune.

“What the hell was that, Faniel?” Sampson asked her when she sat down.

“Oh, just livening up the poor guy’s life a bit.”

“Magic?” asked Devilah.

“Oh no. He’s always had it in him. He just needed someone to bring it out. A great dancer don’t you think?”

“I wish I could… please him like you do men, Devilah. He deserves it.”

“You can’t do that?” Devilah asked.

“I can. But it would be cruel. I never want to be that cruel. I just want to bring joy, but I can’t stay with him forever as he’d like. So no, it wouldn’t be right.”

“That reminds me,” Sampson said, turning to Devilah. “Dev, you may meet those guards later.”

“The ones on the bridge? Why?”

“I… suggested you might like another snack.”

“Oh Sampson! Are you serious?!”

“Well… yes. Did I do something wrong?”

Devilah gave him a kiss that he would never forget for it’s warmth and passion. He was a bit surprised that her raspy tongue could still feel so good inside his own mouth.

“Devilah! Jeeze, I just told them…” Sampson managed once she’d released him enough to talk.

“I love you Sampson. I think they’ll have to be a dessert, not an appetizer. I want you, stud, and I want you RIGHT NOW! Let’s go to our room!”

Sampson laughed and picked Devilah up bodily and carried her off to be ravished out of sight, if not totally out of earshot.

The Quest for the Holy Dildo #5

“Wait! Hold on big guy!” cried the leader, wisely dropping his weapon to the ground and dropping to his knees. The other man was running like a rabbit and Sampson decided not to pursue him, turning back to the man before him. “You want to live?” Sampson asked, not a hint of sarcasm in his voice.
Some time later, Sampson was wearing some much nicer leather armor but trying to console Faniel. “You know, you didn’t have to do that Sampson,” Faniel sobbed. “No? You’d rather have been raped?” Faniel shook her head, her eyes flashing anger and sadness simultaneously. “I can’t be raped. He couldn’t touch me if he wanted to.” “Oh, he wanted to all right. Why? Do you have some special power I don’t know about?” asked Sampson. “I am protected by my Faith. Everything that happens is by my Creator’s design. He wouldn’t allow anything like that to happen to me.”
Look, faith is one thing, Faniel, but this is Skyrim. Maybe me killing that Orc was how your Creator was to protect you.“ Faniel considered that. Finally, she lightened up. "Well, that’s certainly true I guess. Everything happens as he wills it. But that doesn’t mean it’s the only way.” Sampson sighed. “Maybe you’re right, but it’s the only way I know to deal with that sort. Come on, Dev’s gotta be done pretty soon. Let’s head towards the bridge.”
The two began to stroll slowly down the road, each thinking their own thoughts. Faniel broke the silence while the afternoon sun began to sink lower. “Sampson? Do you think it was right to take their stuff? Doesn’t that just make us bandits?” Sampson frowned. He wasn’t used to thinking this much. “They were going to rob us. Surely it’s only fair.” Faniel considered that. “Still, you’re taking property at the point of a sword. We probably should have just let them go.” “Maybe where you come from, that might make sense. Here, it doesn’t.” “May I see that knife-thing?” Faniel asked. “I guess you’re right. I don’t really know this world well enough.” “The dagger? Do you know how to use it?” the man asked the angel as he handed her the blade he’d taken from the bandit.
“I… think I do. Not that I’ve ever held such things before but I find it attractive. I feel like I know how.” “More Angel magic?” “Silly man, there’s no magic. Only the lord’s will. But yes, I guess it’s magic of a sort,” Faniel smiled, hefting the dagger in her hands. “You can have it. I’m not much good with small weapons anyway.” “Hmm… can you also give me that… belt thing?” “Sure!”
Soon the Angel had the bandit’s bandolier across her chest. “So? How do I look?” “Umm…” stammered Sampson.
“You look awesome Faniel! Well, looks like somebody’s been busy!” Devilah laughed as she returned. “We met some friends,” Sampson said, hugging his lover happily. Faniel answered her quizzical look with a sad one of her own. “Bandits. Three of them. Sampson took care of it though. He had to kill one.” Devilah looked worriedly at Sampson, but he reassured her, “You should know better than to worry about me Dev.”
“And how did your snack go?” “Sampson, we both know you don’t want to know. But he was pretty poor honestly. I think I have enough for a night’s stay and some dinner.” Sampson smiled and tossed her a pouch. “Will this help?” “Whoa!” Devilah said as she caught the bag. “Nice! Looks like you two did better than me! This should do for quite a while. Mind if I hold it Sampson?” “Not at all. Come on, let’s get on to Ivarstead.”
The three strode towards the town, eliciting the stares of the locals as night began to fall. Unexpectedly, it seemed that Faniel’s wings caused more of a stir than her lack of clothing. A pair of guards came up to them as they were crossing the bridge into the town proper. “What brings you to Ivarstead, stranger?” one of them said to Sampson, but it was Devilah that responded. “We’re climbing the mountain tomorrow. We’re just here to stay the night.” “No trouble then?” “No trouble intended. Though some of your local bandits found out differently back there a few miles.”
“Bandits? What did they look like?” “A Nord, and Imperial and an Orc I’m told. My friend here had to take the head of the Orc.” The two guards looked at each other. “Osbard’s band. Good job if you killed that Orc. Mean son-of-a-bitch.” “You know them?” “Just from travelers’ tales. They stay out of town. Maybe Osbard will go elsewhere if you killed off his muscle. Tell Wilhelm at the Inn. I expect he’ll spot you a room.”
“I will. Thanks,” Devilah said. “Where’s the Inn?” “Just there, on the left. No trouble, right?” “No trouble,” Devilah assured him and they continued on. “Hey…” the other guard said in a low voice to Sampson as he passed. “Sampson’s the name. What is it?” “Just… nice companions you got there! But the bird’s going to need some clothes. It gets damned cold up the mountain.”
“Thanks. But I suspect she won’t need them anyway.” Then Sampson looked back at his lover as her tail swished back and forth as she walked on. “Afraid the Angel’s off limits, but… how do you feel about tails?” “That gorgeous cat? Man, I’d…” Sampson smiled menacingly. “Shut it. But if you drop by the Inn later, talk to her. Just tell her I sent her a snack.”
“A snack? Look Sampson, I’m not out to get into any trouble!” the guard said, a worried tone in his voice. “Oh, no trouble at all. Bring your friend if he’s into fur. Trust me, you’ll thank me later.” The guard looked to his companion who nodded vigorously. “You sure?” “I’m sure. She rather likes men in uniform.”

The Sword of St. Michael #4

Devilah found herself back where she had started. Despite her joking with Sampson earlier, the stench here made Riften smell like a clean spring morning. Here, all was putrid, burned or rotting. The only thing that could be said for the place was it never needed heating.
She knew better than to resist Agrat, especially when her boss was in this state. As her superior, Agrat had complete control over her by a mere nod of the head. To resist was futile. She had, as the phrase went, abandoned all hope. At least, she thought as she knelt awaiting Agrat to deliver her punishment, she finally got a chance to stretch her wings out again and get out of that conjured outfit. “So, Devilah. I wonder if you have any idea of what your actions have caused to happen down here. What they caused to me?”
“I’m sorry Agrat! It was like thi…” she began, but suddenly a gag appeared in her mouth. “No. No, I don’t think I’d like to hear your excuses. Instead, you listen to me. Our master was very displeased. For just a moment Skyrim hesitated towards our cause, but then it swung back. Way back. It could not escape his notice after that. So he called me into his office. We discussed the matter… at length. Intensely. IN DEPTH! I told him all. And then… The things that were done to me… the things that were inserted into me… THE THINGS THAT SLITHERED OUT OF ME!” Devilah had never seen a demon shudder before. She decided she wouldn’t try imagining it. Instead her thoughts turned elsewhere. But Agrat was continuing after she’d gained control of herself again.
…but no. You couldn’t know. You couldn’t imagine. But you will, Devilah. Oh yes, you will. I learned much from our master. He is very imaginative. Very creative. I learned much from him! Shall I teach you Devilah? Yes. I think I will. I’ll teach you a lot of new and interesting things,“ the demon continued. "In the end, he released me. Do you know why? He released me so that I could find and deal with you. I will now focus only on you. I will concentrate on you. You are now the most important thing in the world to me, dearest Devilah. OH HOW I WILL TEACH YOU!” she screamed at the end. Devilah wasn’t listening anymore. She was remembering someone.
Agrat looked menacingly down at the small succubus grovelling before her a moment. “I can conjure up a lot of devices. But alas, they aren’t designed for winged victims. Those have got to go!” And suddenly Devilah’s wings were gone. Once again she appeared to be an ordinary, if exceptionally voluptuous, Khajiit. A Khajiit very much alone. She would miss her wings. “Do you like my playpen? We’ll be spending a lot of time here, you and I. I’ve warmed it up for you. I had plenty of time to prepare for your arrival. I have devices ready to conjure up that you’ve never seen before! I’m so happy to have you here now, to show you my toys!”
“Here’s one I like. It’s not terribly creative, but it’s very effective. Let me show you.” Suddenly Devilah found herself in a cage, quite small and hanging from the ceiling. Too small to stand up in, and her wrists were bound behind her back. “It’s made of iron. Quite sturdy. And you’ll notice there is no door. No need for pesky imagined scenarios of escape. It’s sanitary too! Everything just drops to the floor below you. Just think, Devilah, no need to go to a privy in there! You’re already in one! You’ll also find that you can’t stand up. It’s amazing how much you’ll want to stand up – but you can’t. Your legs will atrophy. You’ll dream of just standing. Walking will be a distant memory. Running won’t even be a memory…”
Then the demon seemed to change her mind. “But no. There’ll be plenty of time for that later. But it’s too boring. I’ve got much more EXCITING devices to show you. They tend to be wooden though. My flames burn them. Why wouldn’t I make them of iron you ask? Why, the splinters! Splinters are excruciatingly delicious! You won’t mind if I change into a more… conventional body will you?” Devilah couldn’t speak if she’d wanted to. Instead she shook her head without even looking at Agrat. “Very well!” Agrat laughed and suddenly her natural flame-body resolved into that of a human… almost. The reptile-like wings clearly bespoke the demon that occupied it. “There,” Agrat spoke in a much different voice.
“Oh I hate this body,” Agrat lied. “But for you, I’ll tolerate it. Everything for you, Devilah. But where to start, where to start? There’s just so much to choose from! You’ll ride a rather unusual horse, hang from chains in so many delightful configurations, spin around on a nifty wheel that our master showed me. It’ll be a veritable fun-ride Devilah! You’ll have such a good time you’ll never forget it. It will be burned into your memory forever.”
But again Devilah wasn’t listening. She was thinking of time. How time moved so differently down here than in the world she’d just left Sampson in. Sometimes faster, sometimes slower, but always different. “What must he be thinking?” she thought as Agrat rambled on. He would have started asking around about where his little Khajiit had gone that night. And they’d have told him all about her little party. Would he believe them? Knowing Sampson, he probably wouldn’t. Dense as mud. But eventually he might. He’d find out she’d fucked every male in the tavern. Oh shit, admit it, every female too. And he’d be pissed. He’d spit on her memory. Would it make any difference if he knew what she was? Probably not.
“…into every orifice you have, and a few you haven’t got yet!” Agrat was droning on. Trying to scare her, or just making promises to appease her desire for vengance? Devilah decided she didn’t care. Agrat was just blowing off steam. This could continue for hours before she even got around to actually doing anything. But she would eventually. The funny thing is that the fire-demon didn’t even know. How could a demon that had spent so much time with her not know? She was a SUCCUBUS damn it. Agrat was not. She actually thought a succubus could be tortured! But a succubus was different. She was no regular demon. Even incubus’ didn’t have her capacity for pain. Hell, she didn’t even feel pain – not like they did. The body, no even the mind of a succubus was different. She could feel pain, but it had no effect on her at all. And degradation? A succubus? The thought of degrading a succubus was complete madness. No succubus cared a whit about what was done to their body! And to top it all off, her body regenerated at a ridiculous rate! She’d be good as new within minutes of anything this laughable bitch could do to her.“
Only a few things could really hurt a succubus. Lack of ‘food’ for one. That would weaken her. Like a vampire, she would weaken till she was little more than a wilted bag of flesh and bone. In theory it could kill her if left without it for long enough. But males had been so numerous and so willing, it had never been a concern. But there were no males here. Fortunately she’d stored up so much that she was good for months. Even Agrat would tire of her tortures after that long. But… she did hurt. She hurt every time she thought of Sampson. She wanted to talk to him, just for a few minutes. She would feel so much better if she could just explain some things to him. Just to explain how she felt about him despite the things she had done. But that wasn’t going to happen now. All she could do now was to put up with Agrat until she tired of punishing her. Well, she could do that. She’d play the game for this insane bitch. She’d scream her lungs out, faint, whatever seemed appropriate. If only she could stop thinking of Sampson for just a little while!

Sampson and Devilah #13

As they entered the castle, Sampson and Devilah were greeted by the sight of a long hallway, at the far end of which sat a throne upon a raised dias. A dark figure sat upon the throne, clad all in black.
Devilah’s eyes scanned the surroundings while Sampson’s were fixed upon the figure ahead. When no apparent danger presented itself, Sampson strode towards the throne. “At last, we meet Kitty… or should I call you The Black Cat?!” “And you must be Sampson. What have you done to my friends?”
“Your giant Argonian lay unconscious in Riverwood when last I saw her.” “And Shabhira?” Sampson looked uncertainly to Devilah. “Oh relax. She’s just asleep.” “She’d better be. Come forward, although I doubt I could stop you from doing that anyway.”
As they passed the outer hallway, they were struck by the smell of baked cookies. “What on earth is that!?” cried Devilah. “What fiendish trap is this, assassin?” “That,” said Muz-Ra stepping out from a side passage, “is Chocolate Chip.”
“Cookies? You think to stop us with cookies?” roared Sampson. “What’s a cookie?” asked Devilah, stepping up to Muz-Ra. “Mostly flour, butter and sugar – though these have these little chocolate bits.” “Now hold on a minute,” Devilah cautioned Sampson. “They do smell awfully good.” “Try one. I think you’ll like them. Don’t worry, they’re not poisoned or anything. Here, pick one and I’ll eat it first.”
“Trickery. Devilah, don’t do it!” “Oh, lighten up Sampson. Just one surely can’t hurt,” she replied, then turning back to Muz-Ra, added “No need for that, Argonian. I trust you,“ said Devilah as she gingerly took a nice big cookie from the plate proffered. "Why thank you! I’ve got milk to go with it over at the table right there.” “Oh! Sampson, you’ve got to try one! They’re really good! I’ve never had these before. What’s your name?” “I’m Muz-Ra but everyone just calls me Red. And you?”
“I am Devilah. Very glad to meet you Red! These are just delicious. I don’t eat much I’m afraid, so this is new to me. But I must say, some milk would be just the thing.” “Well come back here with me. I promise there are no traps or hidden guards waiting to pounce. I just couldn’t carry the plate AND the milk…” “Sampson, wait just a couple minutes for me would you? I’ll be right back.” “ Devilah, no! Can’t you see it’s a trick?” “Sampson, I’m an unusually good judge of character. There is no deceit here. Maybe a bit of distraction, but your quest can wait.” “ No! No more waiting! Say your prayers, assassin. Your life ends here!” “Oh dear. Sorry Red. Looks like they’ll have to wait.“ "That’s a pity. I had chocolate milk waiting too.” “ *CHOCOLATE* milk? Oh to hell with Sampson, lead on Chef!” And Red led Devilah back to the waiting snack.
Sampson watched in horror as she left. “DEVILAH! Come back!” “Hold your horses, I’ll be there in 5 minutes, tops. Besides, I’m just right here.” Sampson then turned his gaze back to the throne, but it lay empty. “Curse you Cat! Where are you hiding?”
A voice seemed to come from everywhere as he climbed the dias, looking around desperately. “What, you expect me to just sit still while you kill me? Look, Sampson. I was in the Brotherhood. But I left when they were going to make me kill someone! I didn’t have the stomach for it. I may have done some bad things in my life, but I’ve never assassinated anyone!”
“Well, there was that one guy in Helgen,” Muz-Ra suggested, stepping out from the dining area. “Hey, that was in battle. That’s different,” said Kitty, crawling out from behind the throne. Then she looked up at the hulking brute glaring down at her with murder in his eyes. “Oops,” she said.

Sampson and Devilah #4

“I really don’t see why you even bought this place, Kitty. Don’t you think it’s a little over-the-top?” “Well, at least no one bothers me in here. And do you know, I’ve made more money from the farms and the tenants that come with the castle than I ever dreamed! It won’t be long at this rate till my investment is completely recovered!” “And the leaseholders do like you, that’s a plus. I guess the old landlord must have been pretty harsh.” “That’s what they say. A real bloodsucker.”
“Ah, Ubergard! Come in! Sit down and eat with us. We have a plate all ready for you. So what’s been going on at the Tails?” “All is well. The new guards are proving competent. In fact, I’ve promoted K’riss to take my place permanently now. I will just drop in on them to make sure they keep up my standards.” “Well, I do thank you for everything Uber. It will be a lot more comforting to know you’re around. Red and I get a little lonely in this place all by ourselves.” “What about your bat problem?” “I had a man out from Whiterun earlier this morning,” Muz-Ra replied, “He claims they’re all gone now.”
“Oh, this looks quite good Red! You are becoming quite the chef,” said the big Argonian. “Well, I don’t know about that, but I know my way around a kitchen by now. Oh, Kitty, did you see the new issue of Tails that came out?”
“Yeah! Isn’t Cheetah making a splash? This is her third feature in a row!” Ubergard gulped down a healthy portion of steak before replying, “H thinks she’s getting as popular as Udaran!” “Any rivalry there? They did seem to be a happy couple. I’d hate to think this might get in the way.” “Udaran might be feeling a bit hurt. She’s pretty prideful of her status there you know. But it can’t last forever.” “No, I guess not.”
“Are you going in town tonight Kitty?” asked Muz-Ra. “Yeah, later. Mikael is back and I promised I’d dance again.” “I don’t know why you do it, Kitty. Surely you don’t need the gold anymore?” “No, I certainly don’t. But I enjoy it. Besides, Mikael is fun to be around.” “Are you two… close?” “Not like that. Just physically. He’s never going to settle down, and I really don’t want him to. But it’s nice to have a man appreciate you now and again.” “Hmph,” Ubergard grunted, disapprovingly. “Well, for some of us anyway.”
Muz-Ra sighed. “What?” asked Kitty, concerned. “What about your guard friend? Aren’t you two still…” “His wife found out.” “WIFE? You never said he was married!” “I didn’t know he was! …Men,” Muz-Ra sighed again, adding “She doesn’t know it was me, but he said we had to call it off. She thinks it’s some girl in the Whiterun market. She’d probably be horrified to know he was with an Argonian!”
“Well at least it wasn’t a Khajiit!” Ubergard smiled at Kitty. “Well no, ANYTHING is better than that!” agreed Muz-Ra, played along. Kitty laughed, then a thought occurred to her. “Hey, wanna play gargoyle again?”
Kitty burped. “Ah! I’m stuffed. Thanks again Red!” “You want me to clean up?” “No, I’ll do it later. With only the two of us… oops! I mean THREE now that Ubergard’s here! We need to share the chores. I’ll do my part.”
“Well thanks Kitty, but I don’t think you really understand this whole Employer/Employee relationship thing very well. Say Uber, want to go to the archery range later?” “I don’t know why. You always trounce me.” “That’s why! You should learn to shoot better anyway.”
“Hey! Did you see that? A shooting star!” the little Khajiit exclaimed laughing. “I saw it. Do you suppose it means something?” “They’re supposed to be good omens I think,” said Ubergard. “Something good must be coming our way,” Muz-Ra surmised.

Sampson and Devilah #1

Author’s Note: This one’s going to be significantly different. It will be short, lighthearted and I’m having a hell of a good time writing it. In fact, I’ve probably already written ½ of the whole thing. Getting screenshots, unfortunately, takes more time. But I’m having such fun with it that I HAD to post what I have so far. Visually, it will likely be much less lewd than previous Tails. Textually (if that’s a word) it will be worse. So it’s closer to SFW to view, as long as they don’t actually READ it. So consider this a taste of what’s to come. Blatant references to ASOTIL and Evil Quill Weave from http://prequeladventure.com are blatant. Biblical references are also common, and yes, I think I’ll probably be spending some quality time in hell for writing this. ————– …In those days there was no law in Skyrim; but every man did that which was right in his own eyes. Yet in those days arose a mighty hero, Sampson, who brought justice to the land. Riding down from the north he came, clad in shining armor and his mighty sword, Sword. Sampson. Like Samson, said to have the strength of ten men. Like Simpson, the wisdom of Homer.
Astride his trusty steed, Horse, he rode with his dark thoughts bent on a single quest. To rid the land of the guild known as the Dark Brotherhood. Beside him, his faithful companion, Devilah, her tail ever-twitching as she watched for danger with her keen cat-eyes.
Long had they striven to find the Lair of the accursed Brotherhood, until at last the hero had reached his quarry. All now lay dead within and the Brotherhood was defeated. At long last, justice had prevailed and the land would no more live in fear of the arrow in the night, the dagger in the back, the silent death of the Assassin.
“So, Sampson, now that you’ve killed all of the Brotherhood, I guess your vow of chastity is complete, right? What say we take Horse back to that river we crossed, tie her up and take a bath together?” asked the coyly undulating Khajiit. “Indeed, the Brotherhood is vanquished. But the gore and charnel filth will take more than water to cleanse, I fear. For now, however, that must suffice. As to my vow… nay. Your virginity is safe from my earthly desires for yet a bit longer, good companion.” “WHAT? But dammit you said…”
“Ah, Devilah, you still have much to learn. You did not comprehend the annals of the dread guild.” “I read them to you, you illiterate bastard,” the furred one muttered under her breath. “Nay, all have not yet been brought to my master, Justice. One remains, and that one the cleverest and most heinous of all. Her crimes must have reached the heavens, for even the vile Brotherhood rejected her. Of her it is said she was the most stealthy, the most cunning. She remains, oh devoted one. And while she takes breath in this world, my vow must remain. I must not lose an ounce of my manly strength to the temptations of the flesh, for all will be needed in the final battle.”
“Fucking hell.” “The Black Cat, as she was known to the Brotherhood. Khajiit born, as are you my dear servant. Yet while you have risen above your bestial nature to become pristine and virtuous, her path lay not upwards but down into the depths of depravity. Alas, the tome was unclear as to her dark destiny, hinting only at some mysterious document known as the Tails of the Khajiit. We must continue our quest, dear Devilah, until we rid the world of this final Evil.” “Goddammit, and I’d bought oil and toys and everything…” the Khajiit complained forlornly.

Sabhira’s Daughter #6 pt. 2


“Sure Kitty…” Udaran said, passing the soap to Kitty, “So, I ran the idea past H too. He really doesn’t approve, but as he said, he can’t stop us.” “Other than us being gone from the Tails, what’s his problem with it?” Muz-Ra asked. “He says it’s too dangerous. But he did make a suggestion. He thinks we should take Uber.” Udaran explained. “Ubergard? I can’t say I’d mind having her along! Think, she’ll come?”
“You know Uber. She’ll go wherever H asks her to.” “Yeah. That’s true. I’m suprised H would let her though. The guards here are OK but…” “Well, the way H puts it, it’s to protect his investment in us,” Udaran concluded, as Kitty got out of the shower.
“And to make sure we come back maybe?” added Kitty “If you choose to see it that way, yeah – I guess so. But I can’t imagine Uber would try to stop us if we chose not to.” Udaran protested.
“I guess…” conceded Kitty, not wholly convinced.
“Oh, not wearing the new outfit?” Muz-Ra observed. Kitty answered, “Naa. Not until I need it. Speaking of outfits, have you considered what to wear on our trip? It’s likely to get cold.” “I’ve been wearing this regularly since Sabhira died. I feel it keeps her memory close,” Udaran said, looking down at her outfit, “But I’ll bring a change of clothes too.” “I’ve got some old cloaks I’ve kept around for a while we can use if it get’s too cold,” Muz-Ra suggested, adding “and we can always buy some on the way if needed.”
“So, when are we leaving?” asked Kitty, now looking forward to the change of scenery. “I want to get everything together tomorrow, and then we’ll leave at dawn the day after that.” stated Udaran. “Where to?” “Well, there used to be a caravan just outside the Whiterun gates. First we’ll see if they’re still there. If not, we’ll ask around to see where they were going and see if we can catch up to them. They may not know much, but it’s a start.” “Good. I’m ready for a start!” replied the other Khajiit happily.